Why "Lost" is Lost

Lots of people are talking about how "Lost" is spiraling into the depths of crap TV, so I figured, as one of many disillusioned fans, I would add my two cents. Sneaky Edit: There seems to be some confusion in the comments. I am not watching the show anymore, and I doubt I ever will again. I don't think people who still like the show are stupid, I just disagree with them. Also, I've never seen "Heroes," so any insults based on that assumption kinda bounce off. Finally, I like a lot of slow-paced entertainment so, despite the popular accusation, lack of attention span is not my problem.

#1 The Lost Experience

The biggest nail in the coffin for me was the ill-conceived (and tremendously arrogant) Lost Experience. Average, busy viewers like me didn't have the time or inclination for an optional multimedia snipe hunt. One hour a week is plenty, and besides, I figured anything important would surely be revealed within the show itself.

Instead, after sticking carefully to the show for two seasons, I discovered that many of the questions I had been pondering were answered in between seasons in The Lost Experience. In order to get up to speed, I had to read an online FAQ about what was revealed in the course of the game (easily the least fulfilling plot experience of my life).

The Lost Experience spoke volumes about the show and its producers. First, it was an indication that the team isn't talented enough to properly weave the mythology into the plotline. They have these underlying mysteries, they have these characters, and, ah hell with it, let's just make a website explaining some of the island's backstory so we don't have to deal with it.

Second, had viewers like me known how much would be revealed, we might have been bribed into participating. Instead, loyal viewers of the show were punished for non-participation.

Third, what about viewers who didn't have the time or resources to play an internet game? What about old people who like Lost but don't use the internet, or poor people who like Lost but don't have access to the internet, or parents and law students who like Lost but don't want to spend hours every week being screwed around by the producers. The answer from the producers was quite simple: "We don't care about these viewers."

#2 Stupid Producers

On the topic of the producers being idiots, let's turn to their inability to understand the strengths of their own show. Here's an instructive quote from producer Carlton Cuse:

"We don't allow the characters to focus on the mythology. But when we sit down and we work on the stories, we're primarily spending most of our time talking about these characters and how they interact. And I think that if the characters became focused on the mythology, a lot of people would drop out. I think there's a much larger audience that's much more interested in "Who is Kate going to choose?" than the details about who Alvar Hanso is."

Maybe there is a "much larger" audience that cares about a clumsy, cliche love triangle than an innovately mysterious island, but I seriously doubt it. My interest in Lost, like many people's, was centered around the "mythology" and not the ham-fisted characters. I like character development more than most, but a show like Lost needs to keep its characters well-rooted in what is central to the show: the mystery.

Which brings us to...

#3 Characters

If the producers turn all of their efforts toward turning Lost into a Passions-like soap opera, then why, pray tell, are all of their characters crap?

Jack has trouble with relationships. We get it. We've gotten it since the first season. Message received. The flashbacks started as an interesting storytelling device, but quickly devolved into just another way to hold back on as much of the plot as possible. Now, we get multiple flashbacks with the same "character development."

Look, Kate's a manipulator who always runs from her problems! Look, she did it this other time! Oh look, it gets her into trouble a lot! Oh my gosh, it happened again, and it totally parallels what's happening on the island! Flat characters make for boring TV.

That's not to say there haven't been fascinating characters on Lost--Desmond, early Locke, Mr. Eko, Ben--but do you notice a pattern? The only time characters are interesting is when we don't know much about them. Remember how compelling the Locke character was in that first episode in his interactions with Walt? Now think of him in the third season, stumping around the island, transformed from enigmatic to sullen. Every time the producers turn their focus to character development, they bungle the job and ruin the character.

Charlie, Kate, Sawyer, and Jack all started as interesting characters when we knew little about them. Then we learned that little bit was all there was to know and we were going to be hammered over the head with it every week, and they became a burden to watch.

Hell, the only reason Mr. Eko remained interesting is because the producers killed him off before they could ruin him.

#4 Plot Holes

Everybody complains that no one on the island talks to each other to solve the mysteries. This is explained in part by Cuse's comment that they're actively avoiding having the characters talk about the mythology. Because, of course, if you were trapped on a supernatural island with nothing to do, you'd never talk about it.

The real reason, of course, is much more simple.

"The reality is, we've written those scenes, and in some cases we even shoot those scenes. And whether you take our word for it or not, we think they don't work. They're incredibly boring. ... If, for example, everybody got together and basically Sayid said, "Well, I'll tell you, I found this wire ,and I followed this wire," and then somebody else said, "Wait a minute," ... and they started to put it together, it would make for very uninvolving television.

They say "it would make for very uninvolving television," but are we really buying that line? Are they seriously saying that watching characters resolve mysteries is "uninvolving?" Sherlock Holmes is uninvolving? Memento is uninvolving? One of the greatest genres of literature is uninvolving?

Allow me to translate what's really being said: "The reality is, we're not good enough writers to write realistic interactions between this many characters when there are so many questions unresolved. So instead, we're going to pretend like it's not a problem and hope people won't notice that the resulting situations are completely unbelievable wild goose chases."

This, dear producers, is called writing yourself in a corner. When you develop a plotline that you can't explain without an hour of recapping and narration, you are writing poorly. You can blame the idea that the scenes would be "boring," but they're only boring because you set them up that way and can't figure out how to write yourself out of the hole.

Stop giving excuses and start giving answers. I'm not talking about wrapping up all the big mysteries, but for crying out loud, give us something. With so many completely unanswered questions about the island, there's no reason every episode shouldn't contain half a dozen new, tantalizing tidbits of information. Go back to Black Rock, show Jack's dad again, give us anything. You can berate people for lack of patience, but the bottom line is that a compelling plot needs to have constant motion. And instead you gave us Sawyer and Kate fucking in a bear cage for three episodes.

#5 Us vs. Them

This is what it ultimately comes down to. The fans want fun, interesting TV and the producers think they can't deliver it without compromising the plot.

Cuse says: "I think that there are people who fall away because it does require you to really keep up and on the episodes. It's a complicated show."

He truly thinks that the show is such a rich, wondrous tapestry that the only reason people stop watching it is because it overloads them. But anyone paying attention to the audience attrition this season knows it's nonsense. The problem is that we could keep up, and the writers had nothing to give us but the entrances to another dozen plot mazes.

The show hit a point where all momentum stopped. The hatch was fascinating. The revelation of Desmond inside was incredible. Locke attacking a polar bear with a flamethrower was filler, and we're smart enough to know that.

#6 How to Fix It

For characters: Kill Jack. Kill Kate. Kill Nicki and Paolo (or whatever) and never, ever, ever make such a grade school attempt to introduce new characters again. Make Charlie interesting again instead of the whiny, jealous infant he became. Don't screw up Desmond. Cripple Locke and bring back his mystic bent. Let Sayid loose. More Sun & Jin. Make Sawyer say something besides "offensive attention-getter, unimaginative nickname. Sarcastic comment and/or question." Oh, and maybe explain where Danielle is after all this time.

For plot: Get the Others jacked into the mythology again instead of turning them into a Melrose Place-style tangent. Let the characters talk, explore, and care even remotely about why everything is so bizarre, and let them LEARN SOMETHING. Go back to Black Rock. Try to explore the security system's infrastructure. Go to the other stations intentionally instead of accidentally. Give us something about Walt and Michael after they left. Give us serious internal conflict between the "names" and the "no-names." Aren't they sick of sitting around on a beach while Jack and Co. fight pirates and polar bears? Bring on Lord of the Flies mayhem.

For real: It will never happen. The producers' explanations of their goals for the show make it very clear that they are hellbent on ruining everything that was compelling about it. They don't have the imagination or skill to pull it all off and, on top of all of that, they have also made it clear that they disdain the majority of their audience. So, despite its potential, "Lost" is halfway down the spiral and never returning. I suggest you follow myself and 10 million other viewers by turning your back now before the producers waste more of your time.

[Disagree? Read my responses to some very good counterarguments made by Andreas at The Lost Blog]